Who is Responsible for Your Relationships?

“You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself.” 

– Jim Rohn

When sharing our training, I often ask, “Who is responsible for your relationships?” to which most people answer that it’s a mutual 50/50 responsibility. While this answer is logical, there is also a greater truth here worth looking at.

Say, for example, you are married. You are actually 100% responsible for your relationship with your spouse while your spouse is 100% responsible for his/her relationship with you. 

Stay with me here, this is more than just a play on words.

You have no control over how someone else treats you but you do have full control over how you treat someone else. How you treat them is your relationship with them. How they treat you is their relationship with you.

The reason that keeping this perspective front-and-centre is so important is because it helps remove the dynamic of blame from a relationship. It keeps us out of a ‘victim’ mindset as we maintain our focus of attention upon what we actually have control over – ourselves. 

In relationships where people accept 100% personal responsibility for how they show up, there is far less conflict and a greater spirit of mutual respect and collaboration. If this is a fresh insight for you, begin today. It’s not always easy, but it’s well worth it.

To take this understanding to the next step, see this post.

For more tips on enhancing your ability to build and maintain stronger relationships, please visit newayz.ca/fst and check out The Foundation of Successful Teams™ training system. We’re helping teams to consistently improve culture, engagement, and proficiency over time.